Thursday, April 16, 2009

Ima blog more : ]

yeah I know right?

anyway school has been... interesting. I havent been getting into anymore trouble lately. Ive finally simplified things. Instead of thinking about whats "right" culturally, ethically, personally, and what not, Im just going to do what I think is right. I had a problem with doing that before because i always thought "who am I to decide whats right?" I know some people dont know whats right (or dont care?) like psycopaths, and I was always afraid I would be one of those kind of people...

Most of the kids in the program at my school dont have good home lives, and its one of the reasons they are the way they are. Like this one kid, his parents both got fired from their jobs and theyre getting kicked out of their house, and hes not going to be able to go to school anymore. Hes also the kid who punched a hole in one of the walls at school and almost hit somebody in the head with a chair at school. I hope everything turns out okay with him. Other kids get abused by their parents... its just messed up. I wish I could do something, I should be able to do something. Its not right.

Well things are also going to be bad around here for a few days. Well Im going to be in a bad situation, but Im going to try and make the best of it. Things are what you make them, it doesnt have to be bad, right? Anyway so my moms going to be working for the next week, double shifts. So Im literally not going to see her for the next week. And shes freaking out because she didnt make a lot of money and her next paycheck wont be a lot. So we dont have a lot of money. Bills are going unpaid, and turn off notices have been sent. We're running out of food, but we'll make do, we always do, we've been through worse.

Sometimes i get really depressed. I go to school and get made fun of and whatever, dont learn anything, and come home to my mom and step dad arguing about money and talking about "what are we going to do?"

Ohh and the next time you think about being mean to somebody, please dont. First off its wrong, but you also dont know what theyre going through... Everybody has their own problems, and their own battles that they are fighting. Some people, its obvious that they are struggling with it, other people are better with hiding it. I happen to be one of the latter, turned into one of the former, all you have to do is check my wrists.

Well yeah i forgot where i was going with this, but I hope you have a good day anyway.

"So I guess that I will get another head and then get on with my life...You want to know who I really am? Yeah so do I, yeah so do I." xD

I'll think of a good song and post it later, Im so tired lol

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